ADHD resources (partial) for 2024:

I have written some blog posts in the past but this is just the most up to date info I have on the topic. 

FreeMind - mind mapping software - free and allows for non sequential note taking (great for taking notes by disorganized speakers/authors, and or trying to do a "mind dump" without ending up with a giant intimidating list since you can minimize nodes/topics.

https://freemind.sourceforge.io/wiki/index.php/Main_Page 

The authors Edward M. Hallowell M.D. and John J. Ratey M.D. 

Of the stuff they have published I have read the following, the first one was recommended by the psychiatrist that originally diagnosed my ADHD at 22 in 2001, (my parents who I was living with at the time refused to read it), it was basically a breath of fresh air and validated how I felt I had been gaslit over things my entire life by school and family.

 - 1995 - Driven To Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder from Childhood Through Adulthood

 - 2005 - Delivered from Distraction: Getting the Most out of Life with Attention Deficit Disorder

 - 2015 - Driven to Distraction at Work: How to Focus and Be More Productive (By Hallowell MD only)

The authors had a bit of a falling out after releasing the revised edition of Driven to Distraction in 2011, but seem to have gotten over it for the release of ADHD 2.0 that was published in 2022 (which I only just learned about).

Look into "Acceptance and Commitment therapy" (which can help a LOT with beating yourself up when your brain/hyperfocus forces you to repeatedly rescheduling everything).

Also the book which I found after a mini stroke in 2008 (I cherry picked one exercise and still haven't read the whole book):

"Energy Tapping for Trauma: Rapid Relief from Post-Traumatic Stress Using Energy Psychology" by Fred Gallo 

- ADHD amplifies feelings of rejection, and in my case I figured out that I had been carrying around repressed/very early memory that resulted in me dealing with a bit of internal dialogue that would tear through my mind after every conversation/interaction I had with people "why don't they like me?!". After about 2 hours of sitting tapping going through every memory I had trying to find the interaction that created it, I got all the way back to one from Kindergarten (Kindergarten?! WTF?! Right?) I had gotten worn out and laid down for the night. When I got up in the morning, for some reason I tried doing the tapping thing again, and it hit me... turns out my mother would carry me around after my grandmother would come over and hold me crying "why don't they like me?!" (which also turned out to be a pattern that my grandmother did to my mother as well). It was about 2 weeks after I made the discovery to realize something was missing, the whole "why don't they like me" had stopped and I could finally at the age of 29 objectively assess conversations/interactions. 

The worst thing about finally having answers.

Link to video

Note: Comment I left on this video under Ducknoodle (a username that I have had since before Google bought out youtube).

"Congratulations! and Good Luck as you try to move forward!

Something that I picked up from "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie ended up being really useful with dealing with anxiety about "what could happen" after having a mini stroke when I was 29. Paraphrasing a bit, "sit down and write out clearly what you are worried about, all the facets of it, so you are no longer anxious about some fuzzy/vague thing. Then go about improving on the worst. Ask, Is there anything I can do about it? If the answer is no, sit with the realization until you can at least accept it, then think about how to handle it rationally if and or when it does happen." If I remember right it was a story from an American who was doing business in China in 1937 when Japan invaded.  

The mini stroke ended up worsening some chronic health problems  to the point where any one of them would have been severe enough to be disabling all on their own. (Note: the chronic health problems and how they impacted my ability to earn a living were responsible for the majority of my anxiety before the mini stroke). 

I have learned along the way that managing the process of medical care when your regular doctor visits now include monitoring your state of remission with a specialist and ensuring communication between doctors. Improving this skill dramatically reduces the stress and anxiety that the process can induce.  The checklist in the article on HBR.org "The Secret to Ensuring Follow-Through" by Peter Bregman (link below) was extremely helpful with communicating with my doctor, I just altered a few based on the appointment, usually needing to ask only one or two relevant to the current context (I actually have had my doctor read the checklist from the article because I am still dealing with aphasia and word searching problems, and saved me from having to struggle to form the questions I needed to ask because he just said "oh, ok, well this is the process, and no you don't need to come back in before seeing the specialist unless something else comes up.")

Some other books:
 - "Care of the Soul" by Thomas Moore
 - "The One Thing Holding You Back: Unleashing the Power of Emotional Connection" by Raphael Cushnir (this also helped with learning how to process emotions again because of the damage incurred to my brain, I have heard chemo can cause brain damage as well)
 - "The Checklist Manifesto" by Atul Gawande (the section where he interviewed an architect, and communicating as an equal)
 - https://hbr.org/2011/01/the-secret-to-ensuring-follow - Based on the Checklist Manifesto, refer to the "Handoff Checklist" about midway down the page starting with "What do you understand the priorities to be?" Doctors who aren't lazy recognize questions like these as worth answering and won't be as likely to rush out of the exam room before you get your questions answered, and also helps reduce my anxiety if all I am facing is more tests."

Sharing the Journey

How do I inspire others to action when they have abandoned what brings joy into their lives and goodness into the lives of their family?

It is frustrating when I share my certainty about my path, and the type of life that I want and to share with others, and then have the person I have shared with interpret it as me taking that away from them, or that my path some how blocks their own.

How do I find external support for my goals, in the form of community, people to hold me accountable and to challenge me to do better then I have?  How can I communicate support for others in a way they find acceptable, and strengthening?

What way have people found to record and work on ideas over time?
 - www.ning.com -  but its 25 a month.

Books
 - Making Ideas Happen: Overcoming the Obstacles Between Vision and Reality by Scott Belsky

Software
 - Mind Mapping Software
     - www.xmind.net

Cognitive Remediation and the Power of Will

The journey that I have undertaken has not been as easy as I had hoped.  Every time I try to define an area of re-education and then set out to work on it, I keep running into the same problem.  A problem that has resisted efforts to clarify it for several years now.  Only by luck did I actually have a book in my collection that addressed the problem, and again also by luck was another book given to me that mentioned the problem in a way that I understood finally what I was facing.  Will Power.

Yeah I know, ha ha, a concept that is almost non-existent now.  Its either outmoded, quaint, the lack of Will traditionally utilized as an accusation, and rooted in religious doctrine as morally weak, and therefore sinful.  Its no wonder the concept has effectively been erased from popular culture.  Except in terms of "guilty by association" with the church, all of a sudden takes on a whole new meaning.

But the reason this concept is so important is that it is the foundation of all personal change, and all change created by a person in the world for good or evil.  The reason its so hard to get help to get that ability back once lost is that an MD or councelor's value is helping someone in need, and once you start determining your own path, they no longer feel needed or in control, this can turn ugly if the Doctor thinks they're way is the only way.  And of course most patients once they have "achieved" disability rarely leave it even if they could.  So a doctor has very little chance to work with someone all the way back to where they can begin working again.

This in addition to:
 - Cure is a word that has been outlawed by the FDA
 - Normal is a bad word, and doesn't exist in medicine
 - Most treatments for brain injuries are not covered by insurance
 - Most doctors don't understand the difference between cognitive function and mental function

So back to Will Power, it is what I consider to be right on the edge of cognitive function and the brain, and the mind.  Much of the understanding of Will Power at least in the book I am now reading read much like a discussion on Psychoneuroimmunology.  Mirror Neurons, Inhibitor Neurons, and Super Mirror Neurons.  Attitude and health.

It forms the basis for the skills outlined in the table in Skill or Competency.  And without the Power of Will all information that I will learn or practice will not have intellectual or emotional coherence and no lasting learning will take place, nor will I be better for the time and effort put in.

So with that I consider Cultivating my Power of Will the one skill that will provide the greatest ROI.

Power of Will by Frank Channing Haddock.

Temporary Motivation (the Friday afternoon feeling) created from the outside vs taking ownership of the energy, and wielding the limitless supply that comes from within.

In more practical terms, you can read and implement all the books on organization you want, but if you aren't producing any results with your time none of it matters.

Remember the Name by Fort Minor
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5YJfPBqPNE

Self Directed Learning - What I Have Learned

1. That self learners don't know everything they intend to learn prior to starting.
 - they may have a specific result/s they are aiming for
 - and an initial impulse to learn in a certain way.
 - that they have methods and resources they have built up over a life time

2. That traumatic brain injury
 - has a tendency of eliminating the third aspect entirely
 - makes the re-acquisition of the third the aim
 - and simplifies the urge to do something in an certain way into just an urge to do something.

3. When the truths of a persons life have been brought into question due to massive changes in support networks, and income source, the styles of learning, what they originally chose to learn, how, and why all of a sudden become irrelevant, and the those must be rebuilt before any learning can take place... otherwise it becomes a random collection of facts that are used for the moment and then forgotten much like cramming for a test.

Skill or Competency

Thanks to a link from www.ZTCollege.com  I found a list of different items that will help me address the deficiencies I mentioned in my first post.  And in addition I have included the email I sent to the University of Waterloo.

The Letter:
"Hello,

I found your site through ZTCollege.com.  The article that I am contacting you in regards to is the Page titled "Independent Studies; Readiness to learn" questionnaire.  Due to a brain injury I sustained 3 and a half years ago, I am currently disabled I am in in need of redeveloping all or most of the skills that it mentions.  The self evaluation results are: ready but unable.

Unfortunately most of the aid agencies and medical help I have been able to locate have not been very useful, from what I have seen so far with state agencies (I am from New York State in the US) all that I am able to look forward to is getting extended test taking time at a regular university.  

So the question is, what resources are available to address those deficiencies prior to returning to university?  If I were to pick the top areas it would be Problem Development skills, Evaluation skills, and Completion Skills, and the interchange between Evaluation skills, and Completion Skills.

Sincerely,

Gary Reimer"

This at the moment has been copied without permission but the link is below to the full article.
http://cte.uwaterloo.ca/teaching_resources/tips/self-directed_learning_readiness_to_learn.html

SKILL OR COMPETENCY	CURRENT IMPORTANCE 1-very 2-fairly 3-not very 4-unimportant	CURRENT SKILL RATING 1-excellent 2-good 3-adequate 4-poor
Life skills: Organisation of time and resources in your life, co-operation in working with others, available support network
Independence: Autonomy, self-motivation, self-reliance, resourcefulness, initiative, and judgment
"Basic” skills: Literacy, numeracy, graphicity, computer literacy, etc.
Information skills: Ability to find information by: using libraries; abstracts; community resources; interpreting data, charts, tables, timetables, etc.
Study skills: Organisation of material for projects, note-taking and reading for different purposes, understanding assignment requirements
Learning to learn: Awareness of task demands, flexibility, self-knowledge of learning preferences, awareness of learning process, self-evaluation
Planning skills: Ability to design a plan of strategies for meeting learning needs, ability to carry out a plan systematically and sequentially
Problem development skills: Ability to formulate questions that are answerable through various research activities (projects, library, readings)
Analytical skills: Ability to select and use most effective means of acquiring information, ability to analyse and organise information, ability to select most relevant and reliable information sources
Communication skills: Ability to write reports, essays, instructions, discourse, display data, etc.
Evaluation skills: Ability to collect evidence of accomplishments and have it evaluated, ability to accept constructive feedback from others
Completion skills: Ability to identify problem areas, ability to revise work, commitment to completing units and program

Open to all who are viewing this post;
Any feedback you might be able to provide would be appreciated.

Thanks for reading so far.

Self Directed Learning

This is going to be complicated.

Self Directed Learning has a tendency of being that way, and combining that with a brain injury just complicates the process even more.

Much of this blog will be made up of self directed learning information, but it will be done not from the perspective of researcher, but from my perspective as I make use of it.

I will do my best through out to not make this a collection of really interesting articles and information about what is known and is being done in research facilities.  Rather this will be about what I am doing, why I am doing it, and what I am looking to get out of it and additionally how I have ensured those results.

Now for the complicated part:  self directed learning can be looked at in two ways, as a process and as a goal.

So the first objective in any self directed learning program is to figure out the process that I am going to utilize, and define the goal as being stronger as a person as the result.  And this step can not be skipped particularly in my case due to the brain injury that I sustained.

To some this would seem a bit excessive, but the type of damage that I sustained has affected my ability to conceptualize, and to do this on an unconscious level.  Compared to say what most self education is concerned with and that is the specific content.

For me specifically that is the sporadic and poor quality results that I achieve in relation to the amount of time and effort I put in.  

An example of how this problem manifests itself is when you define two different forms of learning:
 - reproductive
 - transformational

And secondly the difference between
 - learning (no matter the process)
 - doing (consistent output)

The first manifestation is between the reading, and the reproducing of that information, in terms of recall time, quality of what is recalled, and the length of time I can maintain attention on a particular task.
 - And this further complicated by the delay in how the information is to be organized, not just in the delay of the information itself.
 - then of course the even more painful truth, sometimes the method of organizing that information/or actions is no longer there, even though the memory of once being able to do something of that nature is still there resulting in me overreaching and not realizing it.

The Transformational type, that is understanding something and then being capable of changing behavior because of it.  The problem is the word "understanding" constitutes a series of processes that I am not even sure has been studied.
 - then of course the transition from learning to doing in this area as well.

And these can be understood in terms of Cognitive Function.  And to address this issue I have taken a three point approach:
 - Lumosity.com (its what I can afford)
 - Traditional Medial care (which I have found to be painfully slow)  I was able to get disability before I was able to get appropriate treatment.
 - Supplementation (balancing results to financial resources)